Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Fixing the Knicks in 5 Easy Steps


I lied. There is no easy solution to fix the Knicks. Everybody thought the ship had a chance to crash back when the season started, but this is far beyond our worst nightmares. The Knicks are 3-13 and sharing the very bottom of the NBA with the Milwakee Bucks. If all that reckless, irresponsible spending seemed cute the last two years, it seems fucking stupid today. The Knicks are stuck with overpaid assets, whom nobody wants, are about to hand the Orlando Magic a superstar for free *. The Knicks are not in purgatory anymore, they have entered hell and there's no end in sight. How can they be fixed?


Hire specialized medical staff

A health specialist. I'm not kidding. Basketball is a young man's game and if you're going to keep hiring guys in their thirties, protect your investment. How can you get the most out of Amar'e Stoudemire before he gets his knees amputated? How can you keep Tyson Chandler out of the goddamn infirmary? If you're going to pay aging athletes obscene amounts of money to play for you, protect your investment. Figure a way to keep them playing. There should be a specialized sports doctor following the Knicks' biggest investments on and off the court. Dont' assume your boys are responsible enough to take care of themselves.


Balance the roster

The Knicks have 15 players on their rosters, including 5 shooting guards. 5 FREAKIN' SHOOTING GUARDS: J.R Smith, Iman Shumpert, Tim Hardaway Jr., Toure' Murry and Chris Smith. Why? Why isn't anybody talking about such a strategic blunder? You have to trade one of your two top shooting guards, since Tim Hardaway is showing telltale signs of emergence. The money move here is to trade Shumpert for a valuable front court asset. Someone who can play inside D and get the garbage balls. Something realistic. Maybe Sacramento would hear us out about Jason Thompson? Also, Steve Mills might want to undo another blunder, cut Toure' Murry, call back C.J Leslie and apologize to him for the honest mistake.


Gain financial flexibility (by any means necessary)

There is no elegant way to get rid of Amar'e Stoudemire, but there is no elegant way of using him in your rotation either. The aging star has lost the extra split second he had on everybody. He is playing a slow, ugly and self-conscious brand of basketball and is getting paid over 23 million dollars a year. It cannot go on for two more years. Amar'e has outstayed his welcome in the Big Apple. The most realistic rumour I heard was that he was going to get moved to Boston for Kris Kardashian-Humphries and Gerald Wallace. Even then, it seems optimistic. The two stooges are useless to Brad Stevens' squad, but at least they're unloading Kardashian from the payroll at the end of the year. Anyway, point is : Amar'e needs to go. Only thing he's achieving right now is to manacle the team, financially.


Start thinking long term

That means START EXPLORING TRADE POSSIBILITIES FOR MELO. He said he wanted to explore free agency this summer, START THINKING HOW NOT TO LOSE HIM FOR NOTHING. No matter what Melo might say, the team is in the shitter right now and sweet promises might lure him somewhere else next summer. Knicks fans wants their team to win more than they want superstars. Trim down that roster. Get younger, quicker and hungrier players. START DRAFTING AGAIN. The ''win-now'' mentality is nice, but the ''win now, next year and the year after'' mentality is better. Smart talent management never killed anybody.


''James, the keys...''


GO HOME, JAMES DOLAN. YOU'RE DRUNK. Seriously, ownership's micro-management never won NBA titles. OK, maybe Jerry Buss did, but he knew about basketball better than most General Managers. Step out, James Dolan and hire good basketball people to work for you. Get a GM that's not a member of Melo's country club. Have mercy on Mike Woodson and fire him before he has a brain aneurysm. There are plenty of good coaches without a job right now: Jeff Van Gundy, George Karl, Lionel Hollins, these guys are known for winning, but they'll need enough leverage to maneuver and it's not going to happen if you're breathing down their neck. Discover the power of saying : ''What can I do to help'' and trusting your people.





* Because of the Dwight Howard trade, whoever sucks the most this season between the Knicks and the Nuggets, gets to send his first round pick to DisneyWorld. Denver had the pick from the Melo trade.

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