The NBA Draft Lottery is Decadent and Depraved

I was supposed to write about the Oklahoma City Thunder's vacation planning checklist this morning and simply post the draft lottery result, but what happened last night was so entertaining for us basketball nerds that Sam Presti and his boys will have to wait a few more days before getting my valuable insight. 

Last night was the 2013 NBA Draft Lottery, arguably one of the most controversial moments of the basketball year. Why controversial? Because you can't usually walk away from it without the traditional shower of accusations that evil, scheming NBA commissioner David Stern rigged it in favor of one team or another. Those accusations usually follow a certain pattern. 

1)Superstar leave a small market.

2)Small market struggles for the following year.

3)The aforementioned small market magically gets no.1 overall pick the following year. 

 The Cleveland Cavaliers lost LeBron James in 2010 and landed Kyrie Irving with one of their two top 5 picks in 2011. Same thing happened with the New Orleans Hornets that lost Chris Paul in 2011 and landed first overall pick Anthony Davis in 2012. Both lotteries were painfully predictable up to the point where the team that was down on its luck moved a few spots and mysteriously landed the first overall pick. It looked rigged. No matter what David Stern and his snake-oil salesman smile wanted us to believe. But this year, things took a funny turn. Everybody got a monkey wrench thrown in their plans, for better or worse.

• The Cleveland Cavaliers won the lottery again and moved from no.3 overall to no.1. The plan seemed clear all-along for the Cavs. Pick small forward Otto Porter. A lackluster, yet efficient wing player to replace the lackluster and no-to-efficient Alonzo Gee in the starting rotation.Now that they have a shot at defensive stopper Nerlens Noel, how is that going to affect their strategy. Maybe not at all, told me Steve Kyler, one of my favorite NBA minds. But nonetheless, the trade rumors have already started. Cleveland has cap space and is tired to suck. 

• The Washington Wizards took a huge leap from no. 8 to no. 3 overall. That's your best bet that the lottery wasn't rigged this year. It was totally random and I'm sure it pissed off a lot of people. Equipped with a General Manager you wouldn't wish upon your worst enemy in Ernie Grunfeld, everybody always hold their breaths when it's the Wizards' turn to pick. They lucked out last year with Bradley Beal, but they are renowned for making terrible choices. Knowing it's not a great year in terms of talent, one can only hold his breath.

• The Charlotte Bobcats got screwed again. They finished the 2011-12 season with the lowest winning percentage in NBA history, only to see the league-owned franchise pass them by for game-changing prospect Anthony Davis. This year, they fell from no.2 overall to no.4 due to Cleveland and Washington advancing in such dramatic manner. Will they luck out and still have shooting guard Ben McLemore available at no.4? He would make a lot of sense playing alongside Kemba Walker and Michael Kidd-Gilchrist.

• The team that is in most dire need for fresh blood, the Phoenix Suns slipped from no.3 to no.5. That's a hard blow to take. Nerlens Noel is merely at dream at this rank. Will they take a chance on explosive guard Victor Oladipo, despite that he is not a proven offensive commodity? What about Canadian heir to Larry Johnson, Anthony Bennett? The Suns need all the help they can get. Their roster in 2012-13 was the most hopeless thing. While Charlotte and Sacramento are the two most non-sensical franchises in the league, at least they have prospects. Not Phoenix. They need someone to put their hopes into. Bad.

• Interestingly enough, the Orlando Magic and their handsome, yet diabolical GM Rob Hennigan have slipped from no.1 to no. 2 overall, which I believe is a blessing in disguise. Free from the pressure of picking the right prospect at no.1, they will probably go for the guy they need, point guard extraordinaire Trey Burke. Orlando is piecing its team back together after Dwight Howard's departure at an impressive speed and Burke's gritty, versatile and aggressive offense might just be the cornerstone they needed. 

 In every sport, the draft is the most strategic time of the year. 2013 being notoriously low in talent, I expect the evening to be wild and chaotic, just like the lottery was. The stakes are low, so GMs are bound to take chances. It's on June 27, so expect me to go on a full, nerd-on mode by then!